So we are nearly one week post the Breaking Bad finale and I’m still concerned. Where did Jesse go? What happens to him now? When will Flynn get the money? What will he do with it? I still have so many questions about the future! But, as far as finales go, wow, they really closed it out nicely. As a fan, I appreciate when I’m given some answers and story lines are finished. I loved the Sopranos, but the fade to black while Journey plays left me a little unfullfilled. And don’t even get me started on Dexter. Seriously, we end with him in some pseudo Wolverine existence?! Lame.
I’m happy to be back here this week to dedicate another Five for Friday post to the Breaking Bad crew. I’ve enjoyed bringing them into my home over the last 5 years! Man was it tense at times, but it was always entertaining! It was also a bit educational. Don’t believe me, well check out:
5 Things Breaking Bad Taught Me
Number 5: How to Cook Meth.
This one is pretty obvious. After all, the show is about cooking meth. Should I ever need to set-up a lab, I need only pick up the box set and treat it like a home study course. I mean if Todd can get to the low 90s in terms of purity, I’m confident I could turn out a pretty bang up product; maybe add a hint of basil or mint. You know, if I seriously ever wanted to change careers…..
Every episode was a class on chemical calisthenics.
This song makes my nerd heart swell with happiness.
Number 4: Arsenic is so played out.
Walt makes Hannah from Dexter look like an amateur when it comes to offing someone via sneaky poison infusion. Ricin is the way to go. And it’s kind of retro too which makes it even more stylish:
The United States investigated ricin for its military potential during World War I. At that time it was being considered for use either as a toxic dust or as a coating for bullets and shrapnel. The dust cloud concept could not be adequately developed, and the coated bullet/shrapnel concept would violate the Hague Convention of 1899 (adopted in U.S. law at 32 Stat. 1903), specifically Annex §2, Ch.1, Article 23, stating “… it is especially prohibited … [t]o employ poison or poisoned arms”. World War I ended before the United States weaponized ricin.
During World War II the United States and Canada undertook studying ricin in cluster bombs. Though there were plans for mass production and several field trials with different bomblet concepts, the end conclusion was that it was no more economical than using phosgene. This conclusion was based on comparison of the final weapons, rather than ricin’s toxicity (LCt50 ~40 mg·min/m3). Ricin was given the military symbol W or later WA. Interest in it continued for a short period after World War II, but soon subsided when the U.S. Army Chemical Corps began a program to weaponize sarin.
And it is continued to be considered for use as a chemical weapon.
“I wish I’d known about Ricin. Those damn arsenic donuts took FOREVER.”
Number 3: Personal Injury attorneys are definitely shady.
Oh the ambulance chasers, the DUI defenders, the loop hole finders! I’m not saying all of these guys aren’t on the up and up, but I suspect there are quite a few Saul Goodmans out there. I wonder if Neil Flitt is secretly defending the crack cookers around Atlanta?
Number 2: Need to launder money? Get a car wash.
Lots of traffic. Lots of cash payments. Illegals working. Perfect. I was a fan of the nail salon idea as well. Now every time I go to a car wash or to get my nails done I look around for signs….oh my god that guy delivering Cokes is totally sneaking in millions of dollars!
Have an A1 day!
Number 1: Sometimes the bad guys are good guys and the good guys are bad guys. Looks can be deceiving.
Look at Gus, he was the hero of the community. What a good guy! Aside from being bat shit crazy and power-hungry coo-coo he’s an alright dude. Oh that guy that looks strung out and clearly hasn’t showered for days? Yeah, stay away from him.
Breaking Bad was full of examples of a bad guys with hearts of gold: Jesse (loves kids, doesn’t want to see anyone hurt, wrestles with any level of wealth obtained through evil), Mike (will off someone and then check in on his granddaughter), and of course Walt (pre-Heisenberg with flashes of compassion just often enough that you still somehow were pulling for a pretty evil-ass dude).
It’s enough to make you wonder, who is scarier, that guys in the suit that you thought nothing of or that tweaker kid you looped out 5 feet to avoid?
It’s all just too much for one guy to take yo.
And a few other lessons:
If you want to kill a meth head, just leave an ATM unattended and the problem will take care of itself.
Fried chicken batter is likely contaminated with meth from time to time.
Grown women who choose an array of purples as their interior decoration pallet are likely crazy and also bitches.
If you are forced to sit home and watch enough daytime TV, you will go crazy and start buying stuff off that gem channel.
Acid will eat right through your tub.
Thanks for the education guys! Here’s to hoping that “Battle Creek” and the new Saul spin-off don’t suck!
Want to read last week’s Breaking Bad post? Breaking Bad: Five Things I Will Miss Yo.
Stay positive & love your life!
Listening to: State Radio – Riddle In London Town
Eating: Jimmy Johns!
Random fact: For some reason a drug that will definitely make your face break out in scabs, your hair and teeth fall out, and will most likely destroy your life never appealed to me. Huh, strange.